Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Randomize
