The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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