More tranny stories later!
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Randomize