hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
