Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
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