1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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