yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Randomize
