I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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