I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
