3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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