My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
