we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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