just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
