Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
