do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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