I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Randomize
