idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
