I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize