Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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