i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
