So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
