you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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