Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
My penis needs a shock collar
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
