it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
