i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
