I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
