Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
