i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
