I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
