so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize