There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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