physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
