have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
