New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
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