...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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