so that wasnt chicken after all
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Randomize