I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
