don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
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