at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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