i permit you to call me
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
