got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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