it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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