I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Randomize
