sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I deserve this hangover.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
