I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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