i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize