you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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