I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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