i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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