my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
