I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
